April's Daily Dose of Rants

04-30-11   All work and no website makes Sonny want to eat soft serve

04-29-11   All work and no website makes Sonny want to eat soft serve

04-28-11   Last summer I was living in a shark tent and eating one baguette a day.

04-27-11   Abraham Lincoln was a Conehead!

04-26-11   I wanted to get into online gaming, but I hate doritos.

04-25-11   Hockey goalies look like autobots.

04-24-11   Do not do this totally badass idea you probably would not have thought of by yourself. http://bit.ly/hf8YU7

04-23-11   My facebook profile picture is me napping, but so is every other photo that has been taken of me.

04-22-11   It's adorable when little kids say "pu-lease"

04-21-11   I want death by soft serve ice cream.

04-20-11   What's your favorite plague?

04-19-11  Day after Easter I go to target and fill up on all the %80 off Chocolate Bunnies; living like a King!

04-18-11   Peeps are not good to eat for me.

04-17-11   There are only two places that have lamb on the menu, high end restaurants or the side of food carts.

04-16-11   Wear a tight hat, and your hair will hurt.

04-15-11   NYC taxis should have cowcatchers.

04-14-11   I still use the windows screensaver that features the pipes that do not end.

04-13-11   Summer weather and Top-40 radio.

04-12-11   Heavy is the head that wears the frown.

04-11-11   You love someone for a while, then one day you realize and say to yourself, "Since when did you talk out of the side of your mouth?" then you say out loud, "it's over," then you're sad for a while.

04-10-11   I can't believe all that was holding up this budget was a "Mandatory Top Hat" law.

04-09-11   POUND PUPPIES, HOOF!

04-08-11   Baseball on tv < Baseball on radio < A play about Che Guevara put on by crickets.

04-07-11   I could have made bank on the royalties of "I got sirius when I switched from XM"

04-06-11   Ebay search for prized ancient religious manuscripts comes back with disappointing results.

04-05-11   Newark should change their slogan to "Jewel of the Crown"

04-04-11   Carberator - hates cars.

04-03-11   I know some arabic, the numbers.

04-02-11   There are giant holes in my fitted bed sheet that remind me of the ozone.

04-01-11   I never see hasidic jews on my runs, explains why their action movies gross so poorly.